Feb 2005

Boo, I Read You

One of the first web-cruisers to leave a note on my xhosux.com website’s Rant & Rave bulletin-board was Dr. Vivian Balakrishnan, who’s now the Acting Minister for Community Development, Youth & Sports. The brief note he posted was officious and telling: “Here’s a stayer”. It implicitly states that for all my public gripes, I’m still living here, so Big Brother is making an example of me anyway. My reply, more in line with how national agendas are vaulted nowadays - i.e. defensively shameless - went something like this: “I’m staying just so I can gripe some more. Staying can be such sweet sorrow.”

The high-profile Minister is, these days, the big time rep for Big Bro’s outreach program to youths, cos he sure can pass for a peer-undergrad to blend in with our gullible young. There he was blinking puppy-eyed optimism in a photograph taken at the launch of Youthink – a new section introduced to the Home pages of Straits Times on Jan 10 ’05. It plainly spells desperate measures to win over the long-alienated young cos Big Brother can’t afford the alienation no more. Y’know these days, he’s got to swallow all his pride and intolerance to watch you dudes get away with chopper (looking)-bikes and in-yer-face tattoos on TV!

The big headline for the launch report (Jan 5 ‘05): “Speak up even if it jars, Vivian tells youths” (not Dr. Balakrishnan tells youths, mind you. Would they ever say – Kuan Yew tells retirees? How chummy.). Why the big reaching out? Are Singaporean youths born reticent and un-vocal?

All Singaporeans know that if we are a pretty un-vocal and submissive lot, we’ve been ‘beaten’ into silence or, at best, acquiescence. But now that the Internet has empowered the individual to be heard worldwide, Big Bro may as well look generous and radical. Besides, we are in dire need of future leaders too (that’s why he now loves your peer culture, twinkies!). After all, he has long alienated most folks from politics – an arena that’s become his divine right. Any dissenting view even when made during General Election season can become libelous in court with ensuing bankruptcy for the too-vocal opposition party concerned. Hence, defensively, shamelessly, Uniquely Singapore, lor (not ‘unique’ as grammar dictates, but you can’t imagine how more-than-unique we are!).

The big quote from sweet smiling Vivian in the papers for that January report was: “The real fear of Singapore, as a country, is that our best days are over. We started off with nothing, we built up and became an enormous success overnight, one generation. Then the question: what next?”

I must say that I’m disappointed in that anxiety. Looks like Viv’s optimism can’t beat mine. Personally, I would never, for a moment, fear that Singapore’s best days are over. Never. Honestly. If our best days are over, it’s a matter of how you define best. Or perhaps - we are really getting to be better than best. Or, who needs best when we’ve got this, this, this and this. Or simply, look, who says our best days are over?! Besides, the best reason I can give for thinking that is – we’ve got the PAP for government. Isn’t the PAP the bestest of the best, the greatest of the great, and the be-all of Singapore’s end-all? The PAP can do no wrong. Honest mistakes, maybe, but certainly no wrong whatsoever, if you ask me. So the best days are over? The PAP can never fail Singapore now or ever. That’s why it’s the only government of choice, remember?

If my argument is skewed and flawed, I can only blame it on the daily press that has come to shape my beliefs. How else are my perceptions engaged and how do you think I get to see that bigger picture? I have no access to secret intelligence and Lord, no - Big Brother, knows I am not into politics at all.

Some Dr. Lim person wrote in to the Straits Times Forum on Jan 10, ’05 saying: “Inculcate some manners too through Youthlink”. My response is – no worries, we’ll even enforce Confucius ethics wherever applicable. And now that we’re so open a society, please don’t be alarmed if we employ some other unconventional or maverick tactics to indoctrinate our young. Be it foam parties, MTV or skate-park composites. For those who are worried about where it all leads… You should understand how it is here - economic and political agendas override all; yes, even so-called moral ethic is secondary if truth be told, e.g. where went the moral argument for casinos and, hush-hush, sleazy gay saunas? But guess what, our nation’s primary economic and political agendas somehow always reflect your neediest concerns, wouldn’t you say? If ever in doubt, lay your mind to rest, we’ve got Asad Latif, Warren Fernandez and Chua Mui Hoong to the rescue and they’ll be on the case soon enough if need be!

Speaking of the daily press, last month’s Fannn Of The Month in the Zircon Gov. Pawn Starz page of my website xhosux.com made mention that the ST did not carry a picture of opposition party leader Chee Soon Juan when he was reported for alleged dishonesty in court. In contrast, a report on a deceased opposition leader (Harbans Singh) carried a photo for identification (of which I also stated in my Files last month that we can deduce that a good opposition leader is hence a dead one). Well, what do you know…. By the time that January Fannn’s remark was up on xhosux.com/zircon, there was a big pic of Chee in the ST! So readers, you may not be officially told, but hey, this column of mine and xhosux.com is considered essential reading to nation-builders. So hint-hint, spread the word, Singaporeans. If you want to support your country, read me too just like they do.

BTW, you may also wanna spread the word that BigO has terminated its bi-weekly e-mail updates with no reason given at all. Let’s get speculating. BigO folks got tired of doing it? Not enough funds? If so, such reasons are admissible. But when no explanation of its termination is given even to close friends, the reason for the termination can only be - not admissible. What does that tell you, Singaporeans? Even Phua Chu Kang sang: “Use your brain!”. Go right ahead, it’s allowed now. We’re free and open… to think, and speak your mind. So, go on, even if it jars!

I hope that the all-smiles Dr. Viv when he reads the above will not take it as a personal attack on his chummy shoulder-rubbing with the young. Just as I’m trying my best not to think that the reporter credited for writing that Youthink-launch report is a wry reference to me.

The name stated was Krist Boo. It’s almost too canny to be true. But you know me, I always do get it! - X’ Ho